Thursday, March 27, 2008

A Sixth Sense

I have had two fears in my life that have been with me since childhood. For both of these fears I can pin-point an exact event that lead to each phobia.

Spiders

When I was 10, I was at a beach house on vacation. I was sharing a room with a friend. We found spiders all over the place during the day and It didn't affect me much, but kind of creeped me out. The last night we were there, I got up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom (a little nervous that I might step on a spider in the dark, I tip-toed carefully). When I got back to my room, I could "feel" a spider was lurking near by, so I turned on the light quickly. Sure enough, there on the wall, 1 inch from my pillow was the biggest spider I had ever seen in my 10- year-old life! I was sweaty, paralyzed and wondering what to do next. I grabbed the end of my sleeping bag, shook it out (to get rid of any spiders that could have crept in while I was out) and went out to the family room. I settled myself on the couch and tried to sleep. No use. Visions of giant spiders were spinning in my mind. If you know me, you know my imagination works overtime with even the slightest hint of a scary idea! I stayed awake ALL night (looking at "Where's Waldo" and glancing around every 30 seconds for creepy crawlies...).
It has literally been 20 years (am I that old?) since that experience and I am not proud to say I have had this fear, strongly, ever since. Ask any friend/ family member.
As a newlywed, I stayed up late one night, waiting motionless, for Ryan to get home from work so he could kill a spider in our apartment. Pathetic, I know. The thing that gets me, is that I KNOW when there's a spider lurking somewhere. It's silly I know, but I swear I have a sixth sense about it! Since having children I have become SO much better! I can actually kill an unwelcome, house-dwelling spider now (unless it's really big and really black).



Large, Mean Dogs

Another fear (which has lessened over time as well) are dogs. Now, I wrote "large, mean dogs" but sad to say, I have actually climbed a tree to escape an angry wiener dog that was chasing me on a run. I have so many dog stories, it's ridiculous! But what triggered this fear was what happened when I was 6. Mom and I were going to be "friendly neighbors" and meet the new family up the street. After a knock on the door and a happy greeting from our new friend, out runs a big black dog ("Annie"...I'll never forget). I scream, it bites me in the rear and I cry. The rest is history.
This is where the sixth sense comes in. I swear I will be out for a run, happy as can be and then I will stop abruptly because I can "sense" the oncoming enemy. Sure enough, I will see a random, stray dog off in the distance. I will turn around and go the other direction and be done with my run. It happened just the other day, actually. To make this phobia worse (just when I thought it was getting better) I wen to see the movie "I Am Legend". When I got up the next morning to run it was super dark outside from the time change. In comes my crazy imagination again. Now, I KNEW hairless, vicious dogs were NOT going to jump out at me from behind the parked cars, or from the dark shadows of the street...but you never know! So, again, because of this silly phobia, I had to alter my running routine. oh dear.
Some day I hope to be phobia free...
I could fill this whole blog with crazy dog stories, but I 'll spare you.

anyone else have any phobias??

13 comments:

Heidi said...

Spiders--don't mind them

Dogs--with you on that one, they scare me especially the stray random dogs.

putting gas in the car--I am actually slowly but surely getting over this one. Darin used to have to do this for me. WEIRD--it's a looong story.

snakes--CREEP ME OUT!!

being tickeled--form of torture

Got bit on the butt? Wow. Ouch!

zuniga family said...

Potato bugs!!!!! There was one outside my house about a month ago and I was ready to move just because it was near my house! Those are the sickest creatures EVER and when I get to heaven (hopefully) I am go to ask God why he created those.

Ben and Shara said...

I know what you mean. I've laid awake from the spider thing as well, I've shaken out my sleeping bag, I still do when we go camping. I've screamed in the night for my dad to kill the spider that I swear is in the covers with me. When Ben isn't home to kill the house spiders I put mugs or other containers over then, so they won't get away until Ben can take care of them.

Well, yesterday I had to kill a medium size wolf spider. I boxed it with the broom for a long time. It kept getting up and trying to leave, even after 2- minutes. It was a long battle. I finally flicked it into the trash. But everytime I neared the trash I had to keep looking in knowing that the spider wasn't all the way dead, just mostly dead. AAHHHH. I hate it.

James said...

I have an irrational fear of snakes which I suppose is fairly common. I just don't even like to be in the same room as one...even if it's harmless.

Amy said...

I am terrified of sharks. I refuse to go in the ocean. Well that and because it almost swallowed me whole once. The ocean, not a shark!

cara lou said...

I tagged you! See my blog.

Emily P. said...

Okay I have a normal fear: snakes. And I have a totally ridiculous irrational fear of grates in the sidewalk. I am positive that some day I'll step on one and fall right through to the sewer. Jared of course loves to exploit this and has taught the girls not just to walk on them but JUMP on them. Oh the love and understanding....

sheena said...

you forgot to add hairless, grey, rabid men on your list. Thats at the top of mine.

followed by boingy fast food chicken, and shopping cart germs.

ali degraff said...

circles...lots of circles...clusters of them. they get me every time!

kelly southwell said...

Ali, you're on to me!

Ryan Southwell said...

I just realized that a combination of these two fears only leads to one thing..... barking spiders!! Now THATS what I'm afraid of.

Marie - Mother of the Bird Nest said...

Once again, I find myself laughing in my kitchen...oh the memories of you and spiders and dogs....funny to me, but i know not for you!

Lori said...

Hi Kelly!
It's Lori Thompson here. I found your blog by accident when I was on another family member's. I am terrified of spiders and my daughter Lainey is the polar opposite of me. She hunts for them! My cousin in law was bit by a brown recluse spider and it was a horrible recovery. I have tortured myself many times over the years by reading websites on spiders trying to conquer my phobia. Hasn't worked yet.